i deliberately used some bad English in an email.
(i mean grammatically non-standard English.)

My housemate was appalled.

So i took it all too far, with a genuine LoLcats poster from icanhazcheeseburger.

i’m fascinated by the way new language evolves in a new environment. LoLcats has become one of the latest new English dialects. If i put on my linguist hat for a minute, it’s easy to find a quote from David Crystal (one of the world’s most amazing academic linguist people), in an article at the BBC.

Word play
For English speakers there are cult websites devoted to cult dialects – “LOLcat” – a phonetic and deliberately grammatically incorrect caption that accompanies a picture of a cat, and “Leetspeak” in which some letters are replaced by numbers which stem from programming code.

“There are about a dozen of these games cooked up by a crowd of geeks who, like anybody, play language games,” said Professor Crystal.

“They might not be reading Shakespeare and Dickens but they are reading and cooking up these amazing little games – and showing that they are very creative. I’m quite impressed with these movements.”

Okay that really belongs on my work blog, but hey, everyone loves the LoLcats, don’t they?

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And a very good turn from Paul Keating on Radio national breakfast, before the election (while Rudd was still at the helm).
“Goodness of heart is a requirement for a good country”.

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Why am i so fascinated by the Australian election, in a year when the rest of the country is busy yawning?

i saw Alex Bhathal speak at the Greens campaign launch for Batman last night, at the Downunder Curry Cafe in Northcote. Very impressed with her dedication, passion and compassion. First and only thing that’s touched me this whole election. Alex spoke from the heart, which is such a rarity in politics.

Alex reckons that if 3,500 more local voters put Greens #1 than last election, Batman will be transformed from the safest Labor seat in the country into a Greens/Labor marginal. Could make a big difference. There are some great statistical maps at the Greens Darebin site, if you like that kind of thing. No wait i’m wrong.. the stats maps are at the Tally Room site, where you can see that the southern end of Batman was bringing around 30% primary vote to Green in the last election.

i like the Greens because they’re not running away from their convictions, chasing the polls, second-guessing what people might want, whistling to any dogs in the audience, or drawing out the worst in the electorate. They stand up for what they believe in, and i like their four core principles,
= social justice,
= peace and non-violence,
= democracy and
= sustainability.

Mythbusting Refugees

This is a good video from GetUp on the issue of Boat People, who represent less than 1% of population growth, but are being demonised by both major parties.

And an interesting segment from the Today Show, where both leaders were confronted by an ad from the GetUp campaign featuring – gasp – a real live refugee person, who won an hour surfing with Mr Rabbit. i wonder how that hour will go?

Plus, an interview with a Weather Vane

.. and finally, a media treat. Last week, several bloggers listed the transcript of an interview between Laurie Oakes and Tony Rabbit, where Laurie repeatedly accuses Tony of being a “Weather Vane”. Good reading, at
= Lavartus Prodeo
= Hoyden about Town

including classic quotes like:

LO: They say people change their minds, but you change yours a lot for someone who wants to be Prime Minister.

…
TA: The point is that I have been absolutely crystal clear…

LO: About changing your mind?

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Some say Julia should have waited longer before calling the election, to give herself time to sort things out with Kevin. Oh well. Too late now. Kevin’s much chirpier since he had his gall bladder removed anyway.

Some say it’s just a circus, and if you live in a safe seat, you have no power at the ballot box anyway. You always have some power. There’s only 100,000 people in any given seat. That means you have at least 0.001% of the overall say. Yeah. And anyway, your senate vote is crucial – whether your in a safe or marginal seat. Here’s a great site showing what happens when you let the party decide your preferences. http://belowtheline.org.au/

There are some good videos doing the rounds too.

EG Tony’s views on women from GetUp

Have a cup of tea with Julia (also GetUp)

..a classic from Gruen Nation – this hilarious 1930′s ad where the pollie introduces his family.

“Come to the big scary man” – the Pitch from Gruen Nation focusses on Tony Rabbit

Oh and the Chaser on Mental Health – funny !

Perhaps the best of all was the GetUp / AEC urge to enrol (too late now if you didn’t) – way more action-packed than what’s been happening though.

Some say there’s no difference between the Labor and the Liberal parties. i totally disagree. Maybe the Australian Labor Party does look like a centre-right populist party full of power-crazed hacks, playing it safe and following the polls. But i’d still rather have them in government than the Liberals who are determined to make an art-form out of deliberate ignorance and mean-spirited prejudice. And i’ll be voting for the Greens – the party of dreamers, who genuinely think we can make this place sustainable.

Oh one video i left out was the foul thing made by a bunch of Christians who say don’t vote for Julia because she’s an atheist.

Foul, ignorant and wrong.

Being an atheist does not mean you are out of touch with Christian values.

To me, “Christian values” is usually understood as being kind, considerate, caring and compassionate, open to forgiving people who treat you wrongly.
Any human person is capable of that, regardless of which organised religion they join or reject.

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And Lee Scratch Perry says, “i no longer smoke weed, but you don’t need to if you have Kate Bush. Her music is all the high you need.”

Had a great musical evening with Jen and David lately, where we attempted to bash out Wuthering Heights on the keyboard. Got a bit trapped with some of the chords.. trying to work out the exact sequence of Ebm F# Ab C# during the chorus.

One of my highlights from the Falls Festival at New Year was this cover of Wuthering Heights by Wolfmother.. and here it is on TripleJ Like a Version. Nice one. i was really underwhelmed by the Wolfmother show until he launched into this song, which made up for the lacklustre quality of everything before it.

You can see from my latest ‘Loved Tracks’ from Last.fm, that Kate Bush has 3 in the most recent 10 right now*.

• Architecture in Helsinki – Hi-Fi (The Low Fi Kids Mix)
• London Symphonic Orchestra, Vladimir Cosma, cond.; – Metro Police
• Etta James – At Last
• Penguin Cafe Orchestra – From The Colonies
• Paul Kelly – Sweet Guy
• Gil Scott-Heron – Revolution Will Not Be Televised
• Norah Jones – Man Of The Hour
• Feist – Gatekeeper (Full mix)
• Lily Allen – Him
• Camille – Au Port
• Joni Mitchell – Woman of Heart and Mind

*Right now, meaning when i write this. Not when you’re reading it.

And my most loved tracks of all time at Last.fm – a lot of B(if)tek in the Top Ten! Because they are one of the best musical collaborations of the last 30 years and i love them.

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We’re about 5 metres back from the festival hall stage, soaking up the funky glam rock disco..

When the crowd starts to go wild over a song I haven’t heard before.

Must be a good one, I guess.

Then I notice a third singer on stage between Jake and Ana.

No way!

It’s Kylie.

Home town crowd, at a disco gig, you would expect some excitement, but this was hysteria.

..and for such a super-daggy song!

i tried to take a photo on the phone, but my phone’s camera is not great at night.

PS oh whoops, i just discovered that ‘super daggy song’ is Kylie’s latest release. *Not* a lame cover of some country and western number. That was the encore – she sang harmony on one of their songs during the show.

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I reckon these two could be really good.

..

Skin and Bone

Lauren Simmonds (had) an exhibition opening Thursday 3 June at the Napier Hotel – Skin and Bone - upstairsatthenapier.org/ Lauren also had a huge piece at the Trocadero in Footscray recently which was astounding and beautiful.. her work draws you into its intriguing depths.

..

The World at Large

Plus i’ve just had a sneak preview of Ahmarnya Price’s latest collection. Ahmarnya’s opening at Gilligan Gallery on the 12th June, a Saturday matinee session. There’s a whole year full of diptych works that had me staring in wonderment for as long as i could. Each month echoes the themes and motifs of the month before, telling a story of hair and skirts and transformation.

Don’t you love that delicious sensation of being surrounded by genius artistic people!

While you’re out cruising the interwebs, take a look at Ahmarnya’s blogspot: she’s collected bundles of her past work:

• ahmarnyaprice.blogspot.com/
• exhibition page on the fackbook site.

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i wish i’d taken some photos, because all the pieces sold within the first 90 minutes, and who knows when i’ll get all the way back to old Brunswick town again.

An owl, a flamingo, a couple of love birds, some kind of hummingbird with a unicorn – all with lovely old world titles. My favourite was definitely the owl and i was thinking of investing, but i took too long thinking about it and bam, someone else grabbed it.

Would definitely recommend you pop into the gallery and see the birds before they fly off to their new homes.

The only reference i can find online is via BrunswickArts’ facebook page with Jessie’s flyer here . (Brunswick Arts in Breese Street, off Hope.)

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There’s been so much going on in my life lately:

• moved house back to Northcote which is very delightful, Lou and Anto have been putting heaps of energy into making a new dream house with a beautiful garden.. i’m struggling to deal with all my excess baggage newly out of storage (move on, baggage, move on);
• went to Womadelaide music festival, an extremely exciting and wonderful trip involving South Australian salt beaches, Mama Kin, Ojos de Brujo, Nortec Collective from Mexico, and much more;
• went to see Alice in Wonderland and loved it – except for the 3D;
• riding my amazing new bike every day and getting so much enjoyment from it – so super fast i have to be really careful;
• joined in Tim and Sam’s working bee sessions up at Elphinstone Manor, put up curtains in their bedroom, worked on a new carport with Tim, planted some trees and helped dig a long ditch for the plumbing pipes;
• read Russell Banks “Dreaming up America”, a history of the USA through his experience of film;
• went to see Lauren Simmonds’ exhibition down in Footscray, an intriguing paper-based installation;
• saw Monsters of the Deep in 3D at the Comedy Festival – very funny;
• joined the first chorus band of singers in recording with Emma Tonkin at Fairfield tafe studios;
• catching up with Buffy season 8 in comic book form, and it is getting super scary,
• plus all sorts of other things involving meditation and yoga.

But telling stories here on the blog.. haven’t had the follow-through lately. Too busy enjoying life, too nervous about writing in public, too stressed about moving house and finding new workplaces.

So there’s the overview.

Maybe i’ll come back with some detail, one day soon.

photo credit: cloud_nine

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Turns out he’s been uploaded all over youtube, and featured on Boing Boing and everything. This is hilarious: watch Lindsay drill some holes in a carrot and then start playing a series of loops.

Maybe i’ll start collecting videos of fruit and vegetable instruments.. are there any more to be found?

Oh yes, there’s a whole vegetable orchestra:

..and a watering can clarinet too:

Lindsay Pollock again with a rubber glove bagpipe:

Links:
Lindsay on carrot clarinet
watering can clarinet on youtube
Rubber glove bagpipe
The vegie orchestra

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So i guess you’ve noticed that Elton has done a John Lennon and made a comment about how Jesus is just like himself.  One of the celebrity bloggers added to the outrage by saying that Jesus was a fictional character anyway, so why wouldn’t he be gay like Batman.

Of course the minute you mention Jesus, you’ll get fifteen thousand comments flaming each other with the torches of internet comment hell. Well no i won’t, but mr superficial got many, mostly because he dared use the F word: fictional!

Anyway i left my own comment there, and this is it:

There’s a great book called “The Pagan Christ” by Tom Harpur, a Canadian Anglican minister. He explores the Christ stories back to 5000BC.

..and similarly to the  Zeitgeist movie, Harpur concludes that the original “Yasu Christos” stories contained a series of metaphors for the human soul’s journey through this life..

.. but the early Christians decided it would help their church if the guy had really lived.

The stories make more sense to me if it’s about the human soul, actually: if you stay connected with your soul during this life, you can walk across the waters of your troubled emotions, always find plenty of food to feed your family and friends, heal the sicknesses that devastate us.

i guess Christians prefer to project that power onto an external spiritual being. And why not, if being powerful upsets you.

Yes i’m certainly in the tiny minority for entertaining these thoughts. Even non-Christians usually believe that this actual person walked the earth at some stage. Not me. The stories are bigger and stronger than that.

Peace be with you all, despite your different beliefs.
michael

Links:

• photo credit: looking4poetry
• Mr Superficial’s incendiary response to Elton’s outrageous comment.
• A long article explores the idea that the historical Jesus is fictional over there: nobeliefs.com/exist.htm
• Tom Harpur’s “Pagan Christ“
• Zeitgeist the movie (Yes i know, it’s a terrible mish-mash of conspiracy junk, but we love that stuff!)

Some great photos from flickr.com

photo credit: danny.hammontree

photo credit: The Searcher

photo credit: Beerbauf

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i’m re-reading chunks of Bill Bryson’s “A Short History of Nearly Everything”. In chapter 19, ”The Rise of Life’, he points out that collagen – one of many useful proteins for life – needs 1055 amino acids to be organised in exactly the right sequence.

And collagen organises itself spontaneously. There isn’t someone assembling it each time.

“The chances of a 1,055-sequence molecule like collagen spontaneously self-assembling are, frankly, nil” (p351). Bryson compares it to a poker machine where you have 1055 slots instead of the usual 3-5, where each wheel has 20 different amino acids to choose from. How long would you have to pull the handle of this one-armed bandit? Forever. The odds against winning are 1 in 10^260*.

Not only that, but as well as amino acids forming themselves into proteins, somehow DNA manages to get in on the act – so that the whole thing can reproduce itself – and then there’s a cell membrane to contain all this activity.

Freakishly unlikely.

Fred Hoyle the astronomer once said that it was as if a wind swept through a junkyard, and a fully formed jumbo jet arose by chance (p352).

No wonder the creationists go mad trying to bring their paternalistic version of god into the equation.

Even the Nobel Laureate scientists like Francis Crick (who sorted out the DNA double helix model) have come up with outlandish theories like aliens “deliberately seeding” the earth with life ingredients such as amino acids via meteors and comets.

So we’re incredibly lucky to be living on earth..

Then why am i feeling so glum?

Better get active. Do the dishes. Find a costume for the Chinese new year dinner party. Get off the couch. Start spontaneously re-assembling myself. etc.

—————————————-
(* 10^260 means 10 with 260 zeroes, and it’s more than the number of atoms in the known universe. That’s big.)

—————————————-
Bill Bryson’s “A Short History of Nearly Everything”, Black Swan edn 2004.

Bryson’s book is such a great read. You find out all sorts of things, for example the universe is 13 billion years old, and the earth is around 4 billion years old, and life on earth actually started around the 3.85 billion years ago mark..

..and in 1946 Reginald Sprigg discovered pre-Cambrian fossils in the Flinders Ranges, but nobody paid any attention because.. i don’t know, maybe it was his name.

—————————————-

photo credit: Steve took it,

photo credit: 8#X

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“i’m sorry, i didn’t hear anything. Please tell me the registration number..”

second attempt

“Did you say ROFL w t f 6 8 3 ?”

another go:

“Did you say LOL w t f 6 8 3 ?”

i was sure the insanely cheerful machine at the other end of the phone line was giving me some kind of internet speak as well as the registration number. In fact i’m sure the eastlink machine with the personality disorder was laughing at me.. in LOLCATS language.

“For F sake,” i cried, “What does it take to get a live human being around here.”

“Now transferring you to an operator.”

.

$5 to drive to Frankston these days.

But all that ART along the way makes it almost worth the cash. The mini-hotel? Hilarious!

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

photo credit: (creative commons at flickr) Thanks: peter forret, and Vermin Inc.

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